Perception is a key component to gratitude. Gratitude is a key component to joy.

Amy weatherly

All throughout our lives, we meet people from all walks of life who became part of our lives in both good or bad. They taught us something positive and changed us for the better.

There are certain situations that were so bad in the past only for us to realize that it has to happen because it changed the course of our lives and most of the time, we realize it as we study the situation and learn from it using Perceptual positions (which I learned during our NLP Master class). Now to answer the question about Perceptual Positioning, it’s an amazing way to build up four things: First, self-awareness and better understanding of our own perception of the world (Seeing the situation in my own eyes).
Second is empathy and better understanding for others (which means standing in the other person’s shoes to know what they feel and their perception of the situation).
Third, strengthen the objective view on the situation (Acting as an observer in the situation).
Fourth, discovering new (cognitive) perspectives and insights into any situation or relationship (Observing the observer observe the situation, it’s like a total stranger in the situation coming across the situation that the observer is watching).

Without further ado, let me introduce to the world the people who changed my life (Positive and negative situations) that helped me grow into a better person. I will not be placing the full name of each of those people but will use their “Alias” and the first letter of their names for privacy protection.

1. “A” (The LGBTQ relative)

“A” is a nice guy, he’s a reader and an elegant and stylish person. Unfortunately, he is a clinical grandiose narcissist. I may have a really bad past with him, but he taught me how to read very fast and pronounce words in English properly when I was a child. He taught me to walk elegantly, move gracefully and have social manners, he groomed me to be a prim and proper lady which I am really grateful for. It’s been years since I met him, but he did help change me for the better.

2. “J” (The Enneagram 9 mentor)

“J” and I met in 2014 in one of the Meet-Up Groups in my country. He made a huge impact in my life by teaching me NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming) which I find so beneficial in my life and career. He, together with my other friends, created NLP Manila in 2016 which now helps people from all walks of life and other companies with seminars and courses that helps people and organizations. It is through his testing that I found out that my Enneagram is 3.

3. “N” (The friend who became a stranger)

“N” is a very dedicated lady whom I adore at work, her work etiquette is really amazing, and she gets the job done. I work in a company that makes people feel like they are family. In my culture, people greet others with a hug, and I was not aware that “N” is not a touchy type of person. I did the inevitable and hugged her during an end meeting to congratulate her on getting the top spot in the department for her hard work. The next day, she stopped talking to me and would be very irritated around me. N reminded me that not everyone is fond of hugs and gestures. She reminded me that a company is not family, from that moment on, I stopped the hugs with everyone. I made her my role model on work ethics which helped me get promoted. N is no longer in my company when the pandemic hits, and I don’t know where she is because she’s a very private person and always a lone wolf at work, but I do hope that someday I can meet her again to thank her for being a part of my life.

4. “P” (The Power Wolf)

“P is a great partner and best friend. He helps me cope with work stress and monitors my work and scores all the time. He is the main reason why I work very hard because he inspires me to be like him, he gets the job done very well, he handles people well at his own work and he is a hard worker who always makes time for those who mattered to him. He continuously teaches me patience; resilience and he keeps on reminding me how he believes in my capabilities and the things I could do for the future. He is also my cheerleader and supporter; he is the patron who granted all my Safety Training and certification because he knows that it’s my passion and he believes that I can do great things despite my illness. Because of him, I feel empowered, and he gave me the courage to step out of my comfort zone.

5 and 6. “P and E” (The ones who love me for me)

P and E are the people I owe my life to, I love them both so much that I always work hard to make sure that someday I can give them their dream religious pilgrimage in Jerusalem and Europe. It’s a bit tricky because I am also focusing on my medical needs, but I know no matter what happens I can give it to them as a thank you for raising me well even if I have been very sickly and for loving me unconditionally.

7. “N” (The IT and Gunpla builder)

N and I have known each other for 20 years, we have our ups and downs in life. He’s the one who changed my last name. He made a positive change in my life by teaching me how to be indifferent and to not give a damn about the people who say negative things to me. Because of him I learned to watch out for myself and my mental health. He made me realize that there is no use in pleasing people just for others to accept me and make me feel worthy.

8. “K” (The Micromanager)

“K” was my manager way back in early 2000. She’s a very religious woman with a great drive for success. She taught me time management and pushed me to prove my worth at work. At first, I disliked it because she was always micromanaging me to the point that line after line of my work, she checks to make sure they are perfect. I was too young back then and I felt that every effort I made at work was fruitless and terrible. Until my efforts became the company’s highlight for the entire quarter for a job well done and being able to get the highest mark. It was then I realized that I should be open as well in trying things that are different from what I am used to doing and to accept criticisms with an open mind.

9. “R” (My former Manager)

“R” is a very fun and engaging manager; she taught me that life is too short to be serious and that we should all do what we can to be a better version of ourselves. She’s wonderful and supportive not just to me but also to my other colleagues. Every time there are promotion opportunities, she pushes all of us to apply. She is also a servant leader. I want to be like her someday. She’s the reason why I got promoted because she pushed me the right way thus inspiring me to do my best.

10. “D” (The History Professor)

“D” is one of the major reasons for my career change in life. He teaches his students in a very passionate way. It is because of him that I fell in love with World History and Literature. His lessons allow us to think critically about wars and possible things that could have been avoided during different decision making in history and the what ifs. He is also the one who inspired me to become a teacher.

11. “J” (The unconditional giver) – Additional

“J” has been with me since birth. He has answered all that is in my heart. He helped me and granted me my request for siblings. He helped me during my near death moments, he helped me overcome my fears and helped me pass my licensure exams and certifications. He protects my loved ones and heals us. He continually watches over me and my loved ones. He is an integral part of my life even if there was a moment when I lost my faith in Him. He kept his presence and love known to me.

(Featured Image by Mohamed Hassan from Pixabay )

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