Musings, thoughts and dreams – The Recluse Soul

Thoughts about work

I used to be very driven, I had a partner and we built a company in another country, that company is still in the industry and successful in that country today. I’ve written books and modules for that company I built with that partner but after giving all the resources to him, he discarded me…

Lupus as A Blessing

I am airing out that I am grateful for the circumstances that I am in. If not for my heart breaking miscarriages, It’ll be too late for me on my Lupus diagnosis. Yes the disease progression speeds up as the months go by but if It was undetected, my life is hanging on the thread…

To The Friend I No Longer Talk With

Even if we have drifted apart, I just want to thank you for bringing joy and color into my life. may you be happy always.

Why is Death depicted as ugly?

I was browsing through the internet about life and death looking for a proper picture for one of my categories on this blog. I kept scrolling down the image views and there are common denominators. Most of the time, death is depicted either like a monster, a spider’s web, a skeleton, an old man with…

Relationship & Marriage: Don’t be with or marry someone who makes your heart giddy.

Hold up Ladies and gentlemen. Before we react to the title, let’s discuss why you should never ever marry or be with someone who makes your heart giddy. Love is a fleeting emotion, it’s a euphoric feeling, one of the best and gives you a boost of liveliness and energy. When we are inspired and…

Weird dreams about my children.

The very first dream happened when I was 23, I saw a really bright light taking me from my room and up to another place. In that place I was embraced physically, spiritually and emotionally by a masculine force of light (I can still vividly remember the face of that man/being from my dream).

It’s impossible to stay happy and positive

Lately, I feel so tired. I feel so sad, I feel so lonely. Yes, I do have my family and friends, I am happy when I am with them. I graduated two degrees and have my Masters, I have a great job with awesome perks, I can do or buy anything I want to. I HAVE EVERYTHING I NEED BUT I FEEL LIKE I WANT TO JUST GO SOMEWHERE ALONE.

Finding the positive in disappointment (January 25, 2019)

We all experience setbacks and today was one of them, while some tends to stay grumpy, I searched for the positive. Good things I have seen today despite of not being able to see my new doctor because the schedules are not updated online. 1. Two children waiting for their turn outside their pedia doctor’s…

Living with Lupus and to the man I love

To the man I love and loves me back, Thank you so much for choosing me. I know there are times that you may or may not have regrets in marrying someone like me, riddled with diseases, a ticking time bomb who will pass ahead of you in this life time. We never know.

The Irony of a Miscarriage (May 16, 2018)

When you think about a pregnancy and you think about the beginnings of a human being forming and all the things that have to go perfectly, it really and truly is a miracle when it happens. You have two sets of genetic material coming together that have to divide, and sometimes things go wrong. The simplest way to think about it is that miscarriage is sort of nature's way of making sure that a human being is compatible with life.